Why RUSH Grace Under Pressure is important to me.

A couple of months, in the Spring after Neil died I had a vivid dream. I was in an elevator riding up a very tall building up to a floor where it stopped. I was riding to see Neil by invitation. We spoke no words, all communication was telepathic. When the elevator door opened, there was Neil, young still but middle aged, so tall, handsome and smiling that sweet smile he had with the most kind eyes. I smiled back. The dream only seemed to last a few seconds and when it was time for me to go I asked if I could come see him again and he said, in no words spoken, “yes”. So, I returned to the elevator that stayed stopped on that unknown level in the high rise that seemed to be maybe 30 floors up, or maybe it was 27, who knows, but before the door closed Neil said “wait a sec” and he reached inside the mechanics of that elevator door at the very bottom between the two walls and pulled out a toothpick. Then I was allowed to leave and the elevator door closed and descended. In the dream, I walked out of the elevator and I guess I tried to go back in right away but the elevator stayed put in place.

So, what was the significance of that dream? Well, the entire time I dreamt the music from Distant Early Warning was playing but it was not from the album and there were no lyrics sung by Geddy Lee either. There were only the instruments, drums, bass and guitar with the MIDI systems (they used "a Roland D50 as the master controller, a Roland JD800, two Prophet VS's, and a Roland JV1080 synth module [Source: <"Rush's Live Midi Secrets Revealed" - EQ, July 1997 (2112.net)>]).

Allow me to explain. You see, before I had kids I went to a lot of concerts. A lot. Hundreds and those depended on which city or town I lived in at the time, so you can see why shows could be forgotten in my case. That Fall of 1984 I had just gotten out of the Army the previous August and settled in the GTA. News everywhere was RUSH was to film a concert and I suppose that would be just like me to say “Let’s go”! I bought a new outfit just for that and remember the shopping.

Fast forward to Spring of 2021 I made a meme from a screen cap from the remastered video by StickHits on YouTube. Prior to his Uploading that video, I would watch, off and on over the course of however many years, that blurry video of The Spirit Of Radio, of which I forget right now whose Channel it was on. I would think now and then, “Hey, that chick looks a lot like me but it couldn’t be, no”.

One time, while watching the StickHits video that he published March 7, 2021, I took a capture of Neil, with his rat tail and made a meme. That day was Sunday March 14th, 2021, quoting a line off the song and his lyrics. Still by that time, I had no real recall I was at the show. This was the beginning of what I like to call “My RUSH Journey” although it probably really began back in 2020 when I wrote an Email to Richard Houghton telling my story about sneaking into Permanent Waves at the Max Bell Arena, sneaking behind the roadies trucks after a long bus ride and getting caught inside a dark hall way by some tall guy because we were giggling nervously. Then another guy came over and kept talking to them about RUSH and they let us in, which was cool. But I digress...

Over the next several months I began watching more videos, talking to other fans online (which I never did before, my RUSH fandom was a 46 year secret and the only people that really knew how much I knew about the band were my Mom and my two sons) except for those I found online starting in about 2017, so that makes it a 43 year secret that way. I re-read old articles online that I read in magazines, news articles and what have you, and I still do now, rediscovering things and information forgotten and put into the back of the long term memory storage warehouse. It was in November of 2021 when it finally clicked that I was at the Toronto Grace Under Pressure show when it was filmed. There I was with my two friends Lupe and Basil. Still friends with Lupe today but Basil has since died. RIP brother, he was a great friend, a great guitar player and we had some good jam seshes, great parties and it was Baz’s mom who taught me how to make a proper cup of tea that would never taste bitter.

I am the uber blonde girl in the white peasant blouse beside my friends when the roof light comes down about 3:37 minutes (about four rows back from the stage on Alex's side). Basil with mustache in striped shirt with white collar and Lupe beside him, not sure who the guy in the white t shirt is on the aisle, just some guy I didn't know as I don't recognize him.

I see my two friends at the beginning of the video at 0:37 but I am not between Basil and the guy I don't recognize. I'm not there yet, so I can only guess I decided to make some sort of dramatic entrance walking down the aisle at the start of The Spirit Of Radio and that would be just like me!

This is my RUSH Grace Under Pressure story.

You can watch The Spirit Of Radio video in 1080p60 HD here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zI5KWfq91kM

And Distant Early Warning that I dreamed about here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqLjfJiYEwM